USING AFFIRMATIONS TO CHANGE LIMITING BELIEFS.
I sometimes share my affirmations on Instagram (@jinti_fell) and I wanted to talk a little more about them. Specifically about how I identify and change limiting beliefs using affirmations.
Around June last year I became interested in using affirmations because literally everything I was reading was pointing towards using the power of thought in creating your reality. Achieving your goals didn’t seem so much about hard work (although it can involve that) but more about changing your inner voice and the story it was repeating.
I was happy with life, but I dreamed of something more in alignment with what I truely wanted. For that to happen I knew I needed to make changes. This is where my affirmation writing and repeating began.
In the beginning I got into a good habit of saying them first thing in the morning and then through-out the day when I noticed limiting beliefs arise. Now I tend to say them less formerly in the morning and more and more throughout many moments of my day when I am being present.
Before I get really into it I just want to explain what an affirmation is to me. Basically, I think our beliefs are a series of thoughts that we continue to repeat to ourselves. Some have gone on for so long that they are buried deep within our sub-coconscious. We might not realise we are even holding onto these beliefs because we live by them without questioning them.
Some beliefs are really supportive – they help us. But other beliefs can be extremely limiting. They are at the core of feelings of unworthiness, shame, the need for approval and validation. They keep us small. An affirmation is a way for you to re-write and consciously choose the beliefs that will best support you in your life.
But its also about letting go of the beliefs that you no longer want to live with. For me it has not worked like a Band-Aid. Affirmations have been more of a complete mental renovation.
When I began creating affirmations I found it very difficult to write anything too substantial because I didn’t even allow myself to dream for fear that it wouldn’t come true. With practice it has gotten easier, especially as I witness the results before my eyes.
The practice of using affirmations does not end after you speak them in the morning. Think of them like a magnet. They draw towards you people with particular messages and situations that you need to experience. Each day you have the opportunity to either move forward, surrender and embrace new beliefs or sink back into old reactive thought patterns.
So that is how I understand affirmations. Now I wanted to kind of run you through a recent experience I have had with overcoming a limited belief so that you can see what its like in practice. If you have followed me for a while you might know that I have been working on lots of stuff to do with money. So whilst this example might not seem like anything substantial – I believe it’s the decisions we make in these ‘insignificant’ moments that truly shape the life we experience.
We were parked up at a beautiful beach and Ayana was asleep in the back of the van. The sun was shining, the water was crystal clear and it was literally straight outta my dreams.
I started getting hungry but didn’t want to wake Aya up by making something. There was a nice cafe with vegan options 100 meters away and I started thinking about heading up there before I quickly stopped myself. Then my mood began to drop.
Chris was in the front seat editing and I asked him what we could make for lunch. Without a second thought he said go get something at the cafe.
My instant response was “I can’t”. I was chewing my nails and Chris sorta smiled at me and said “I thought money was flowing into your life” (this is part of one of my affirmations). I started to list all the money we had been spending lately and all the reasons why we shouldn’t spend more. It made me feel uneasy and well, basically shitty. For me, I try to use feeling ‘shitty’ as a signal that I need to bring awareness to my thoughts. That there is something more I need to explore. In the past I would use different things to distract me from exploring anything more deeply for fear of what I would see. But what I have learnt is that only when we lean into that feeling of discomfort can we expect to grow.
Chris looked at me and asked what it was I was worried about exactly. I began to let the feeling I was experiencing be felt. I feel this very physically in my body – its like you begin to dip your toe in the water and next thing you know you have plunged into the deep end.
But when you allow yourself to be in that space of emotion eventually everything begins to settle and you find clarity and perspective.
I realised that I didn’t want to buy lunch – not because we had no money in the bank – but because I still believed that I was poor. That I had to save, save, save. That money was limited to what I had experienced in the past. There were many thoughts arising from a place of lack, of not enough.
I believe that the story we are telling ourselves is what we are attracting. You see the affirmations I had been using regarding money and abundance were helping me to become aware of old beliefs that were no longer in alignment with the future I was trying to create. I looked around me and decided that I was ready to let go of that story. I was no longer going to attract the energy of ‘not enough.’ So instead I took a deep breath and calmly said to myself:
“I HAVE FAITH IN THINGS EVEN THOUGH I HAVEN’T YET EXPERIENCED THEM. I AM GRATEFUL FOR ALL OF THE MONEY I HAVE HAD. MONEY FLOWS TOWARDS ME FROM MULTIPLE SOURCES AND I AM DESERVING OF ABUNDANCE IN ALL AREAS. MY INCOME IS NOT LIMITED TO MY PAST EXPERIENCES – OPPORTUNITIES ARE ENDLESS.”
I spoke to Chris about where I thought the feeling originated from and talking about that combined with my affirmation had me feeling much better. I ended up going to buy lunch and it didn’t make me feel guilty. Instead I just felt grateful (and not hangry haha).
IMPORTANT: this does not mean that I think you should always go and spend your money or do the thing that made you feel triggered or uncomfortable. In this situation it felt good to go and buy lunch so I did. But if I had of decided that making lunch was the best decision in that moment then I would have chosen that option.
I believe that there is nothing more important then following what FEELS GOOD and right to YOU. So much so that I try my best to ensure that I only spend money when it feels good. Okay, let me explain that a little more – if bills arise or expenses pop up I try and give thanks for the services or resources they provided instead of being upset about the spending. For example – the van needed some unexpected work a couple of months ago. It cost around $1000. In the past I cannot tell you how much I would have worried and fretted about this. How would I get that money? What was I going to do? What areas could I restrict spending? This is so shit, of course this would happen now ect ect.
This time though I realised that it basically didn’t bother me. This was certainly not because I had more money in the bank than in the past (quite the opposite actually). Instead I thought about how lucky it was we got it sorted now – before it was worse. How much I loved our van (our home) and wanted to look after it as best I could.
Spending money from a place of lack, or stress and worry does not change the fact that you are going to have to spend the money. Resenting paying your electricity bill attracts a very different vibe to paying it full of gratitude for what it has provided (hot water, power ect) You are going to have to pay it either way. How you feel whilst doing so will determine what you will attract in the future.
My change in mindset surrounding money is without a doubt a reflection of using affirmations. Even at the start, when I didn’t believe in them at all, I kept going and slowly I am seeing changes in my relationship with money. I am worrying less, appreciating and living in the present more. And importantly, I am seeing results and being supported.
Sometimes I slip back into doubt and fear. Worrying about everything. But I know that the changing of beliefs is a practise over time. A re-wiring of the brain.
I don’t think you must 100% believe in the affirmations you are saying when you begin. But over time, with practise they make you feel good and as your trust grows so will the benefits of the affirmations!
Affirmations can be used in all areas of your life – they are certainly not restricted to just money. I am only talking about money as its something I have been personally going though. But I basically use affirmations in all areas so let me know if you would like me to share more examples.
So to summarise – affirmations have been a powerful way for me to retell the story I want to experience as my life and using them has helped me to identify old limiting beliefs that were no longer in alignment with my true desires. For me it hasn’t been as simple as repeating them and watching my life magically change. In fact, sometimes its been really uncomfortable. Looking within and questioning your own beliefs can bring up lots of shit – its a vulnerable process. But in my opinion its always worth it.
Sending my love ~ Jinti
PS. I have not written about these types of things before but I really want to be honest and share my journey as best I can. Please let me know if you have any questions – but most importantly let my experiences merely show you perspectives. Make choices based upon your own internal compass.